On choosing a wedding dress

Confession. I bought my dress before Dan even proposed.

We got the ring custom made and it was taking forever to get done and my mom was in town so we said to heck with it we're getting the dress. I told Dan the night before we went shopping for the last time that if he was going to back out he'd better do it then cause we were bouts to drop monies on a dress. To which he replied why would you think I'd back out. He had a point. 

Back on track

Choosing a wedding dress wasn't super difficult for me. I knew what I liked and what I didn't like (lace yes but not too much, beads yes, but not too much, mermaid NO, princess No, A-line maybe, Full skirt- yes, tulle yes, etc.) We'd looked at wedding dresses before and I had found some on Pinterest that I LOVED.
ex:

There was one especially that I just wanted so badly. V-neck, beaded fill, full tulle skirt. Gorgeous. And it looked amazing on the model.

See. It's gorgeous. 

My mom and I looked at a few places and there were a few dresses that we liked at each one. We went to Gateway Bridal down in Salt Lake City, UT (which, though we didn't buy the dress from there, I'd recommend it- good selection and not outrageous prices). I showed the lady helping me the dresses I liked and wanted to base my ideal dress on. I showed her my "ideal dress"and she told me that they had it!!! AND it was on sale- it had been a sample so it was old and worn but nothing a good steaming couldn't fix. I thought my dreams had come true. I had her pull the dress and put in on and BAM! the dress looked AWFUL! cue tears. It made me look fat. I'm 5' 6" and fluctuate between 125-130 lbs. Not fat. I have a 34C chest which is big but not outlandish. But this dress made me look/feel plus sized. 

It's the same dress as above.

 I just looked like a whale in it.

So I didn't really cry. It was fine. I just blamed it on the dress. It was old and worn and it pulled weird across my chest etc. The darn dress! But you know what? It wasn't the dress. It wasn't that I was fat. The dress of my dreams just wasn't meant for me. The model wearing the dress probably had an A or B sized chest and was a model. Lets be honest- I'm skinny but I'm not size 00. This dress was made for someone who needed to look fuller not for someone who actually has to wear a bra. And therein lied my problem. I wanted a dress for a model not for me! The dresses I looked at were meant for women who didn't have my body type.

Up to that point I had only been looking for dresses that had full skirts and didn't really accentuate the curves that I have. Luckily- because I figured this out after I bought my dress- my mom pushed me to try some more fit and flare (not mermaid) style dresses that were more flattering in showing off my figure instead of hiding it under tulle. My mom actually had a dress pulled off a mannequin that caught her eye. I had totally ignored it because it was all lace and tight fitting and had this huge flower feather sash thing that I was 99% against. Luckily the sash came off so that changed my mind about it about 50%- enough to give it a chance. This also meant we could add a sash that had some jewels on it which broke up the lace making more my style. {Also- side story- the first time we looked at dresses I found this other PERFECT dress that had this polka-doted lace-y fabric that was perfectly summery. It's called point d'esprit and it's fabulous. Simple and fabulous. I'd kind of been looking for another dress in that fabric because, like I said, it's fabulous}  Anyway side story over- this dress my mom had pulled had point d'esprit fabric underneath the lace in the train! It was a sign from the wedding dress gods that I needed to get this dress. Eventually, this dress that I had completely written off at first glance became the wedding dress of my dreams. 

After I decided on the dress we had to bring in alterations. Originally the dress was sleeveless and a little too low in the front and back so we had to fix that up a bit. We continued the point d'esprit fabric in the extension of the sleeves (1/2 sleeve flow-y with lace trim) which was a dream come true. We purchased an entirely different sash from BHLDN. We got some lovely jewelry to go with it (earrings Anthropologie and necklace Nordstrom's) and the most perfect shoes (online somewhere). It was perfect, perfect, perfect. 

Perfect

Moral of the story. Just like in all other shopping dress for your body type. Find a dress that flatters your shape. Find a dress that you love and that makes you feel beautiful. Also be open minded- don't write off dresses just because they're not exactly what you think you're looking for. Try on all kinds of dresses- you'll actually know instead of assume that something looks good or bad on you. I'm not saying you can't get a princess or mermaid cut dress- if that's what you dig then dig it hard. Get what you love but make sure you're not leaving your actual perfect dress behind.